Burp vs Fart

Which is more disgusting? A fart or a burp?
A friend of mine recently said that it was quite a humiliating experience for her when she farted, audibly, in front of her boyfriend. I wondered, isn’t it more disgusting to burp loudly? If you are about to say that burps don’t smell as bad as farts, then I’m sure you’ve never sat next to someone who’s just had a sumptuous meal of chicken, garlic, onions and the like.

While a fart usually has a characteristic “type” of smell, burps can smell of various things. You get an idea of what the person ate a few hours ago. You can’t get that from a fart. It’s just a foul smell. You never say “Damn! You just farted the Garlic you had for lunch!” On the other hand, it’s quite common to say, “When the hell did you eat Biryani ?? I smell it in your burp!”. Infact, sometimes, burps smell like puke. And for me, puke smells far worse than shit.

Do you realize, you don’t actually see someone farting? You might just see their face get all serious and then a pause when it looks like blood’s rushing up their face, and then a relieved looking expression mixed with a look of anticipation of whether you got caught. When one burps, on the other hand, you actually see it happen. I mean, if you look at someone about to burp, you can actually imagine the gas coming up from the stomach, through the pipes. The voice box in the way doesn’t exactly make it pleasant. And most people think it’s a performance! They open their mouth wide like a hippo and let it go. And the face shows it all. You see the place from where the gas is coming out! A lot more disgusting compared to a fart! Also, technically, a fart comes out of a smaller orifice. And it also passes through two layers of cloth! (I’m talking of regular people in a social environment. Don’t get all technical on me.)

Let’s be honest, farts can be the source of good humor once you let go of inhibitions! When a kid burps, he/she just smiles. When he farts, have you see the laughter?! In the case of elders, it is quite amusing, since you never know how the fart will end up sounding! They might put a lot of effort, but it might come out as a small “puiink”. They might be trying to get away with a silent one, and then, “Darr”;Oh well, now that know anyway, “DARRRRRRR. PHUFFFF. PUIIIIIN. PHURRRR!!!” Grandparents are a treat to watch when they fart! Their intestines aren’t quite as strong as ours, so they have to bend on one side to let go. I think one day I will see an old fat ajji topple over due to the force of the gas coming out in the inclined position! Gas out through the back indicates that the stuff that went in from the top has successfully passed through the system. A burp sucks because the mouth is meant to be the inlet, not the exhaust system!

Oh, also, sometimes farts don’t smell at all. A burp on the other hand, almost always smells of something.

Which do you think is more disgusting? A burp or a fart?